DISCLAIMERS:
1) I do not own Rurouni Kenshin, Fushigi Yuugi, or Gundam Wing. They belong to whomever created them (Nobuhiro Watsuki,
Yuu Watase, and um...the person dude who created Gundam I forget!)and published them (Jump Comics, Sony, Pioneer, and
among others...)
2) I'm just making this for entertainment purposes only, so please don't sue Ayame-chan! Ayame-chan has no money anyway!
3) If you have not watched some parts of these particular series, then there are some spoilers ahead!
AYAME-CHAN SAYS: Kakakakakakakakaka!!! Oh-kahay. I'm calm. I'm calm. I need some sleep....
* ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
I A Tragic yet Hilarious Fic of I
I Jeopardy....sort of I
I I
I By: Ayame-chan I
I I
* ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
Title ~ Final Round, Fight!
(The cheesy music sets in again. All but one booth is full.)
Host: Kobanwa, minna, and welcome to the final episode of---
Audience: Jeeeeeooooooppppppaaaaarrrrrdddddyyyyyy!!
Sanosuke: Che. That's really starting to annoy me.
Ayame-chan: Well, there's nothing we can do about it. Besides, the show's almost over.
Heero: (who's still glomped on by Ayanami_Chan, by the way) *Thank you, Kami-sama.Wait. (remembering Ayame-chan's last
words "You can glomp him after the show") No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! The show can't be over yet!*
Host: This final episode is the Death Round! Unfortunately, Nakago and Soi were beyond saving so they were ousted from the
game.
Tasuki: Che. Serves the @#>!$' bastard right.
(Ayame-chan throws a bowl at his head and it breaks.)
Tasuki: Ow! Why'd you $^!~#$* do that for, Ayame-san? I thought I was your favorite character!
Ayame-chan: You're ONE of my favs, Tasuki. Besides, like I said before, children are watching this. At least Sanosuke was
kind enough to stop.
(Sanosuke has a light shining on him from above and acts innocent. Misao bonks him on the head with one of her kunai.)
Host: (sweatdrops) Um...ok. Anyway, folks, we still have our remaining characters sooooo the scores are Tamahome and Tasuki
-- $6400, Kenshin and Kaoru -- $10,600, Sanosuke and the newly joined in Misao -- $7000, Heero and Duo --$4500, and
Wufei and Dorothy with amazingly with $9000.
Dorothy: What do you mean "amazingly"?!? Ayame-sama, you need to find a different host.
Ayame-chan: (shrugs) Hey, don't blame me for not sleeping. Besides, the host can say whatever he wants to.
(The host bows in gratitude and continues on.)
Host: Anyone can take the lead. Now we're going to start our final match of---
Audience: Death Duel!!
Duo: Heh, heh. This is my type of game! (he pushes the statued Heero and Ayanami_Chan out of his way and takes the buzzer)
I'll take care of this match for you, Heero.
Ayanami_Chan: Ow, that hurt!
Misao: Can we just get started already?!? I need to go see Aoshi-sama!
(Two screens light up on the bored.)
Host: And the category for the Death Duel Jeopardy is...(the screen doesn't show the category) Huh? What happened?
(The mini TVs instantly change into Yahiko and Nuriko, who are making faces at the camera. Ayame-chan disappears in the puff
of smoke and reappears behind them, whacking both of them on the head with a metal fan similar to Tasuki's. She changes the
screen back to normal and reappears next to the host again. The contestants sweatdrop.)
Kaoru: How-how did they get in there?
Sanosuke: (hiding behind Misao) Those TVs sucked out their souls!
Tasuki: (in a similar way) They've been sucked up by the TVs!
(Everybody facefaults.)
Duo: Geez, it's just a TV. Haven't you ever heard of the word "technology" before?
Kenshin: Oro? Techno-what?
Duo: (in an expasterated sigh) Oh, nevermind.
(Ayame-chan and Ayanami_Chan, who is off Heero for the moment,look at one another and shrug.)
Ayanami_Chan: I didn't know they were scared of TVs.
Ayame-chan: Oh, just you wait when they see a photograph...
Ayanami_Chan: How did you get them on the show?
Ayame-chan: Aaaahhh, my lil secret. Go on.
Host: Well, um, anyhoo. The final category for Death Duel Jeopardy is....(he can't believe what he's reading) Anime Characters,
Dead or Alive?
(The others are a bit confused. Ayame-chan and Ayanami_Chan cackle hysterically...Tomo-style. The contestants sweatdrop
once again.)
Kenshin: Oro?
Sanosuke, Tasuki, Tamahome and Duo: What kind of category is that?
Ayame-chan: (to the host) Can I explain to them?
Host: Sure, I guess.
(Ayame-chan stands up from her comfy swivel chair, finally, and snaps her fingers. A map-like picture of informations appears
in a puff of smoke. She takes out a meter stick and points out what she's saying.)
Ayame-chan: Anime Characters, Dead or Alive, deals with answers about a particular anime character from one of your series.
For example (she points her ruler at Roy Fokker), this ace combat pilot, leader of the Skull One and is in the TV series:
Robotech. He died in the line of duty by getting shot down by ace Quadrano Miriya Parino. The answer is - who is Roy Fokker?
Got it?
(The contestants nod. Ayame-chan sits down again.)
Ayame-chan: Good. Just write down your wagers first, since you now know the category.
(More cheesy music sets in and lasts for about thirty seconds as the contestants write down their wagers.)
Ayanami_Chan: Ok, got your wages? (The contestants nod) Good. Now, the answer is--
~Anime Characters, Dead or Alive~
These three characters faced similar fates dealing with mental help.
Host: Good luck.
(Now, even more cheesy music comes in. Kaoru is writing down the answers for Kenshin, because he has really bad handwriting.
She quickly sets her "pen" down, smiling happily. Tamahome and Tasuki are still contemplating with one another, arguing in loud
whispers from time and time again, but eventually writing them down in peace. Duo and Heero are quick, just like Kaoru, but
their facial expressions are neutral. Heero's more than Duo's. Sanosuke and Misao are still thinking. And Dorothy and Wufei
are pretty much done. They don't go near each other, though. The music stops, and Sano and Misao quickly write whatever they
could think of down.)
Host: Okay, now let's start with Heero and Duo, who are currently in last place.
(Their screen on the booth says "Who are Lady Une, Wufei, and Tasuki?")
Host: No, I'm sorry that's the wrong answer. How much did you wager?
Tasuki: Nani? I'm not #*$(#@ menatlly ill like that &#*$($%) bastard, Nakago! YOU'RE the ones who--
(Ayame-chan deathglares at him, and he shuts up.)
Duo: Hey, you just get angry too much, that's why.
(Tasuki swears under his breath.)
Host: (sweatdrops) *Weird guests!* Anno, you wagered $1500, so you went back down to $2000.
Heero: Omae O Korosu.
Host: (he ignores Heero's threat) Tamahome and Tasuki, you were second to last.
(Their screen on the booth says "Who are Nakago, Miboshi, and Ashitare?")
Host: Um...no that's not right either. (he says quickly in order to not get clobbered) You have one right, however. What was your
wager? All of it. So, you go back down to zero.
Tamahome: Nooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!! (He bangs his head against the wall.)
Ayanami_Chan: Why is he doing that?
Ayame-chan: Okane boy here lost all of his money. Is Miaka going to love this.
Host: (he ignores the commentary and continues on) Our next group, Sanosuke and Misao! You're answer?
(Their screen lights up and says "Who are Shishio Makoto, Miboshi, and Dorothy?")
Host: Correct! What was your wager? ...All of it as well. So you double your score and take the lead with $14,000.
(Sanosuke and Misao give each other high-fives...although Sano has to bend down a bit to reach Misao's height.)
Dorothy: Hey! That's not fair! I'M one of them?
Ayame-chan: 'Course you are. Do you know how twisted your mind is?
Ayanami_Chan: Don't complain. Besides, you should be honored.
(Dorothy harrumphs and slumps down against the wall behind her.)
Host: Wufei and Dorothy, who were currently in second place...
(Their booth screen says "Who are Shishio Makoto, Nakago, and Kenshin?")
Kaoru: (who's held back by Kenshin) What in the world did you write?!? You don't even know who Kenshin really is!!!!
Kenshin: Maa, maa. It's not their fault that they think I'm strange, de gozaru na. If it's strange, then it should be Shishio, de
gozaru ka.
Kaoru: Datte, Kenshin!
Host: Um...that's wrong as well. What's your wager?
Wufei: This is injustice!
Host: (he ignores him and continues on) Only $2000, so that leaves you with $7000. Now, our final contestants who are in first
place, Kenshin and Kaoru!
(Their screen lights up and says "Who are Shishio Makoto, Miboshi, and Dorothy?")
Host: Correct, as well! Your wager?...$3,100. That makes Sanosuke and Misao our champions for today!
(The audience cheers and the female audience screams.)
Sanosuke: Good, now I can pay my debt!
(Everybody facefaults)
Misao: Hey, I get half too, you know.
(Yahiko pops up out of nowhere)
Yahiko: And me, too! I was in the game for half the time, you know!
(Sanosuke facefaults)
Sanosuke: Oi, what do you mean? I never said anything about giving away the money!
(As the bickering ensues, Ayame-chan and Ayanami_Chan look at one another. Ayame-chan nods, and Ayanami_Chan gleefully
glomps on to Heero again.)
Ayanami_Chan: Heero! (starts singing) `Heero, heero, heeeeero. Heero iiisss miiinnnee.' (she cackles hysterically)
Heero: (with the same hilarious look on his face) Please, help me. Somebody.
Ayame-chan: (puts her hand on her forehead) Oh, boy.
(Tamahome comes up to her and begging on his hands and knees.)
Tamahome: Can I have some okane, Ayame-san?!? Onegai????
(Tasuki whacks him on the head with his Tessen.)
Tasuki: Tama! Get off her!
(They both begin to ensue a brawl. Kenshin and Kaoru look at one another.)
Kaoru: What a weird group.
Kenshin: You can say that again, Kaoru-dono.
Wufei: This is injustice! The game is rigged!
Duo: Whatever.
Dorothy: Relena-sama. What should we do next?
(Relena is a bit digusted and on the verge of killing Ayanami_Chan.)
Relena: Dorothy, leave me alone for now. Please.
Host: (sweatdrops) Um...well that's it folks. The end of the show! See you next time!
(Ayame-chan completely walks off from the fight and goes over to the glomped Heero and Ayanami_Chan.)
Ayame-chan: Ne, Ayanami_Chan. What's next?
Ayanami_Chan: Truth or Dare!
(All the action stops and the characters look at the two authoresses with the glomped Heero in horror.)
Everbody (w/the exception of those mentioned): Noooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!
~Fin~ ^_^
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