AN: I am ALIVE!!! ^_^. Yes, you lovely readers, Ayame-chan still lives. She's just been busy preparing for the transfer to college...and a somewhat more hectic life ^^. I haven't been really in a thrilling mood the entire time of my writing absence, mainly because of family problems. What else to do with your life to relieve some stress other than writing? ^_^.

*Ahem* Anyway, enough about me. This is for you guys, right? in the world did I get this me see....

My friend Kaede and I were discussing about many speculations that other FF8 fans discuss about. You know, Laguna and Squall are *coughcoughrelatedcoughcough* , the story about Raine, what about the other characters, etc. etc. You know...very general things that the game has left implied or open for fans to think about.

And then she brought up rumors about who Ultimecia *really* is.....hence this idea turned into fanfiction.

This sets around the battle of Ultimecia, so if you haven't quite gotten there yet AND haven't finished the game, then don't read on if you don't like spoilers ^^. If you don't care, then go ahead and read! ^_^

DISCLAIMERS: I think you know the drill already...besides, if I *did* own SquareEnix, then I wouldn't be here writing this pathetic angst fic of mine.

Oh hint --- a sorceress cannot be pure without a knight.



an FF8 oneshot by Ayame-chan


It was what I always did, reflecting on the past, things I could have done.


Could I have been able to prevent it? To prevent his death with mine rather than reviving him through the ring?

You couldn't have done anything.

True. The result would have been the same; he would be corrupt, destroyed, helpless in the dark that consumed him. Darkness much worse than mine.

But then he wouldn't have to have lived as long as I have.

What if it never happened?

The memory of his death was my only reason for Time Compression. I couldn't go back in time like how I was now. It was a feat impossible to do. Not even Ellone could accomplish that for me.


I would not have to resort to the ring. He would remember me, smile like he always had done. Not like now --- the wretched feline that growled and hissed upon my every command: reluctant to cooperate with my orders.

If I could just combine past, present, and future into one...maybe I could see him like he once was. Maybe he can end the suffering that I have had for the past 400 years.



So, this is it...

Squall and company stood in front of the vast double oak doors, doors that would lead to their final obstacle.

"This is it!" Zell spoke out Squall's thoughts, swiping the air with his fists.

"We're finally going to face her," Quistis added.

"Whoo-hoo!" came Selphie's energetic reply.

"Let's do it," Irvine drawled.

Squall nodded silently in agreement, reaching his hand for the door handles. Rinoa didn't say anything, but then again she didn't need to. He knew what she was thinking, feeling. Under that thick wall of suppressed emotion of his, Squall Leonhart was just afraid of the battle as she was. He didn't know if the others were the same.

So many "what ifs" ran through his head, but he pushed aside. There was no turning back now.

When his hand reached the door handle, an image of a lion flashed by. He reflexively snapped back his hand, a bit surprised by the strange image. The lion was growling back at him, its amber eyes glaring.

Do not whispered to him.

"Squall?" a hand gently touched him on the shoulder.

Pulled out from his thoughts, Squall turned his head slightly to one side to meet Rinoa's concerned eyes.

"Are you okay?" she asked him.

"I-I'm fine..." he quietly muttered back.

"Yo, what's the hold up, Squall?" came Zell's voice behind the couple.

Squall shook his head, ignoring the question, and opened the doors, blocking out any doubts that came through his head. There's no time to think about that.

But why did the lion warn him to not enter? And why did it look so....familiar?


Sorceress Ultimecia sat upon her throne, silently observing the group of SeeD entering into the room. She kept her face rigid like stone, but she was smiling on the inside. Her amber eyes caught the sights of herself and her knight enter, and she remembered happier times. The other members then followed, and an involuntary surge of hatred flowed through her veins.

"SeeD..." she icily announced to them, her eyes narrowing. Ultimecia was silently shocked by the sound of her own voice -- it had been a while since she actually spoke. A strong accent lingered, too much influence by the nomads she met long before, she supposed.

Yet Ultimecia still continued on.

"SeeD...SeeD, SeeD, SeeD, SeeD, SeeD!" She waved one hand emphatically as the surge of hatred continued to flow deep inside of her. Too many memories flashed through her mind -- too many memories of THAT event which seemed like yesterday. She blamed them all for his death. Edea. Cid. Garden. SeeD. Esthar. She blamed them all. For everything.

"Kurse you, SeeD," she continued. "Swarming like lokusts akross generations, all of you will face the same fate. The ever elusive Time Kompression is almost complete."

Ultimecia stood, stretching out her tattered wings. "You will face a death beyond death under my rule!"

She called upon a Flare spell, tossing it at the brunt of the small crowd below her. They scattered before the spell could make contact, and her fragile heart twisted in pain as she saw him protect who she once was from harm. His ice blue eyes stared coldly back at her, the wind of the explosion blowing his hair in all different directions.

If he only knew the truth...

Awaiting for death would be much harder than she thought it would be...


Destroy them...

No, I can't...I won't...

It's useless, impossible...

I...I WANT to do's for the best.

He doesn't recognize you.

I know that, but....

Just kill them, it's inevitable that they will die by your hand....'re wrong...

Oh, don't be silly. You know I'm right; I always am.


Upon death's door, Sorceress Ultimecia Rinoa Heartilly screamed, disappearing into time. The better part of her life smiled and welcomed the life after death.



He lifted his head for the first time she he found himself lost. Her soothed him somehow.


Thank you. And I won't let it happen to you again; I promise...

An angel's feather drifted down from the gray sky, and a small light of hop filled his soul. Squall patiently waited for it to fall in the palm of his hand, and embraced its light.

It was only then when Squall Leonhart discovered the truth about Sorceress Ultimecia.