AUTHOR'S NOTES: in the world did this come about? My mind works in such evil ways....*coughs* Anyway, this idea came up after watching GSD on a horrible bootleg (well, it was okay, not the best HK bootleg as they constantly changed Requiem became Guonod and Shinn Asuka became Shinn Firebird in the subtitles XD) and after a random fanfiction reading spree in the GS/GSD section.

This takes place after the ending of Final Plus of GSD, probably some months or a year after. Just pretend that Stargazer doesn't exist =). Enjoy for all you KxL fans! (Or you can yell at me...for what I did...I note that this has got to be one of the shortest oneshots I've written)

DISCLAIMER: The usual deal. If I owned the Gundam enterprise....why in the world would I be here?

She could hear voices, lots of them. And although she could hear them and the urgency that lied in them, she could not understand what they were saying. The words were muddled, squished together. The lights that seemed to move so quickly above her bothered her. She wanted to close her eyes, to block out the blinding light and the noises that echoed in her head but she found that she couldn't.

Why couldn't she close her eyes?


A familiar voice that held the same urgency and concern as the rest of the muddled ones rang clearly in her head. She forced her eyes to search for the owner of the voice, the one that always managed to calm her fears and she his. Her vision was blurry, she realized, but for some odd reason she could see the owner of the familiar voice quite clearly, especially when he called her name a second time. His familiar face emerged among the blur of green and white figures. Violet eyes hidden beneath a mop of brown hair looked down at her with a sense of urgency, shock, and...fear.

Her mind finally began to register the searing pain in her body, reminding her of what happened and where she was now. She closed her eyes only for a brief moment as she felt the pain, which caused the owner of the violet eyes to call her name again.


As soon as she reopened them, she never took her eyes away from his. Lacus Clyne managed to voice out his name before they were separated by light and darkness.


He watched helplessly as the doors to the operating room closed. Kira Yamato somehow managed to find a row of two or three chairs nearby and collapsed onto one of them, the willpower in his legs finally giving way to the helplessness that was overcoming him. He felt lost, helpless, useless. But more than that, he felt anger. He was angry at the man who attempted to kill the beautiful woman who had become his light, his reason to still be alive today. However, most of the anger lied with himself.

He couldn't do anything to prevent what happened. He was too far to run and take the shot, too far to be able to protect her. The blood that he tried to stop was still on his hands. It wasn't his; it was hers. He was used to seeing death before, but this was different. This was Lacus' blood on his hands, not those of the enemies that he killed. Kira stared at the floor as if it was the only thing that was keeping him sane. One question kept on running in his mind, over and over again.


If he was built as the Ultimate Coordinator, why wasn't he able to protect the very people who were close to him? How is it that he could fail at protecting one person who meant the world to him and yet succeed in protecting millions?

Kira, it's okay to cry.

He rested his elbows on his knees, hands staying far from his face and head bowed down just enough for his arms to close in around him. The white floor of the hospital looked as if it was just waxed, showing his blurred reflection and tense face. His eyes brimmed with tears, but he didn't allow them to fall. He refused to cry; he had to be strong. For her. For himself.

As the hospital around him continued to run its duties, Kira Yamato stared down at the floor and his reflection and hoped and waited. That was all he could do -- the rest lay in the unknown.